So, Jon just said it last night... the thing I've been catching myself doing: being a victim. O my, he's emailing and being a jerk... damn the child support is late again! Efff.. he's texting me at 3 a.m. again. I'm letting this define me. Kind of wallowing in it. Okay... absolutely wallowing in it. I'm glad he said it. It's helping my attitude change. Don't get me wrong, I don't like the picture he held up to me; but that's kind of what best friends do. They shake you out of your self pitty and drop kick you through the goal posts of life as needed.
Beyond the victim thing... which I'm dealing with... I am grappling with a new... occurence. I 'catch' myself being happy, immediately question what the hell I could possibly be happy about, and then remind myself, IT'S OKAY TO BE HAPPY. It's weird. But happy :)
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