Dreams

Since discovering I was married to a person capable of exquisite lies and absolute cruelty, I have had one, recurring dream. Every. Single. Night. I'm at the ocean, and the waves are white and crisp and clear. They come rushing in at me, warm and comforting. The only sound I can hear is the crashing water and the only think I feel is warmth. I am completely alone and completely content. Last night the dream changed a bit. The sea was obstructed by huge rocks, but I could see the water spouting over them. And the water that seeped up to the shore was cold. The sand was white and warm.

I'm not sure why I keep having these dreams. I can say that if I could be anywhere right now, it would be sitting on the beach at Ocean Shores. I love it there. Some of my best memories are there and every summer, I look forward to the annual trip. In fact, I love it so much, I refuse to allow the haunting memories I created with the liar to prevent me from making more happy memories there with my daughters and for myself. 

So, I looked these dreams up on dream interpretation sites and they seem to agree that water is the metaphor for emotions. Apparently, the crisp white waves represent cleansing and new beginnings. The rocks I saw last night represent obstacles I must overcome within myself. Wow... who knew? LOL

I'm starting to understand those obstacles more... but not enough to write about them today. I will say the most surprising thing is that they are obstacles I have created for myself, and which the liar identified and played on.